My girlfriend organizes a gift exchange every year A lot of people come to exchange junk gifts, but they’re always jokes I wouldn’t say they’re classic jokes, though anything goes, as long as it’s funny This is my first time, but I’ve been told that last year’s highlights included a 2liter can of lube, a bag of over 100 rubber duckies, several 3kilo cans of green beans, a cock ring, lube, porn, and a bunch of other stuff I can’t quite remember Sure, they can be very sexual, but they don’t have to be funny These kinds of gifts are acceptable, but I prefer something less sexual, as it’s not my style and I know at least a few people who would be, so I want to compensate I’ve given funny gifts before, but they usually have a practical purpose I don’t like the idea of spending money on something that’s only a joke for five minutes and no one needs It seems like a waste to me My best efforts to find something on my own resulted in a cheap potty, a toilet book, and maybe some lazy stuff It’s kind of funny because it’s literally scat humor, but I think someone could use it if they wanted I think it’s an acceptable alternative if I can’t find anything better, but I’d really like to find something better, so I’d appreciate suggestions if anyone has any Long story short I’m going to a Secret Santastyle gift exchange where the gifts can be anything, as long as they’re funny and cost 30 or less, and I need some ideas on what to bring
A bag of penises jelly Baby wipes to wash away your sins This book “How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives” it’s hilarious An office inflatable tube man think of those weird inflatable tubes you see in front of car dealerships A potato no explanation Nature’s Dicks 2024 Calendar, a wall calendar with Nature’s Dick photos
A voice changer is fun
The largest cardboard cutout of a celebrity of your choice that fits your budget Colored, glowinthedark, patterned, etc condoms You US dollars’t believe the variety A bikinipatterned apron or similar A personalized record that only plays sound effects farts, screams, etc Decorate it however you like Search “mystery” on eBay, Craigslist, etc, and see what you find Nipple covers with Gollum’s face on them they’re US dollars and sold on Etsy A Tshirt from a nonEnglishspeaking country with slogans the most I’ve seen are from USA they have all kinds of funny but disparate phrases The largest pack of temporary tattoos you can find A playroom mirror
Classic, nonclumping clay cat litter Useful for ballasting rearwheeldrive vehicles on snow and ice if you can find it, it also works to absorb spills, oil leaks, vomit, and other nasty liquids So it has its advantages But it’s also completely unexpected it’s bulky and heavy For years, I volunteered with my church’s youth group Every Christmas, we hosted an unforgettable gift exchange The year I sold my truck, I gave away 70 kg of cat litter I was a little disappointed because a girl who hadn’t yet been to youth group came with her parents and older brother it was her first year in the group, and this family was initially hesitant to let their son participate One girl saw the huge box and thought, “That must be a great gift” She wasn’t thrilled when she opened it But her parents raised her well, and she got through it with only a few tears, and I think she still had a lot of fun Other things I’ve given over the years An old tube TV with builtin antennas and dials I wonder if it was 2006 Three lightweight dining room chairs Our violinist sisters received these and loved them because they fit perfectly in their practice room For a few years, I subscribed yearround to any gift I could find online People were always excited to receive them because you never knew what was inside There was everything from essays on adult diapers to posters about the electromagnetic spectrum, tshirts from random companies or universities, a bunch of calendars, magnets, stickers, and more
I gave my son and sisterinlaw bathroom lights They change color and are motionactivated They loved them
Tortilla blanket It’s a blanket It looks like a tortilla You snuggle up in it, and it transforms into a delicious snack Practical, fun, and if your partner uses it, you can call it a “beaurrito”
A pencil sharpener shaped like a nose
I like the portable toilet idea I used one for a while, and it’s practical Plus, it would be fun You could also buy toilet paper, either plain or with a funny print I’ve seen rolls with politicians’ faces on them or with prints that look like they’re made of money Something like that Another idea would be to buy a lot of gift cards, but in funny amounts Like 2 per card Would that be cruel I don’t know
Okay, but hey, a small potty It changed my life I’d love to have one
Chia Willie Nelson
A penis coloring book or a jar of sperm if you run out Both are available on Amazon
TJ Maxx sells weird stuff I recently found a glitter Catgirl eyeshadow palette and thought it would be a fun gift They also had a Shrek palette
Wow, a 4liter can of lubricant hahaha